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  • How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive? ~The Simpsons by Matt Groening, spoken by the character Homer Simpson



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  • As a cure for worrying, work is better than whiskey. ~Thomas A. Edison



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  • When it comes to exploring the sea of love, I prefer buoys. ~Andrew G. Dehel



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  • The cat has always been associated with the moon. Like the moon it comes to life at night, escaping from humanity and wandering over housetops with its eyes beaming out through the darkness. ~Patricia Dale-Green



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  • Creditors have better memories than debtors. ~Benjamin Franklin



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  • Poetry is the revelation of a feeling that the poet believes to be interior and personal which the reader recognizes as his own. ~Salvatore Quasimodo



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  • If it ain't caffeinated, it ain't coffee! ~Author Unknown



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  • He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city. ~Proverbs 16:32



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  • When you blame others, you give up your power to change. ~Author Unknown



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  • Who needs astrology? The wise man gets by on fortune cookies. ~Edward Abbey



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  • There is no god higher than truth. ~Mahatma Gandhi



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  • Arizona looks like a battle on Mars. ~Author Unknown



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  • The great thing about human language is that it prevents us from sticking to the matter at hand. ~Lewis Thomas



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  • One man's daydreaming is another man's woman. ~Grey Livingston



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  • If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning. ~Aristotle Onassis



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  • There is no curing a sick man who believes himself to be in health. ~Henri Amiel



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  • Eighteen holes of match or medal play will teach you more about your foe than will 18 years of dealing with him across a desk. ~Grantland Rice



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  • I don't think jogging is healthy, especially morning jogging. If morning joggers knew how tempting they looked to morning motorists, they would stay home and do sit-ups. ~Rita Rudner I don't think jogging is healthy, especially morning jogging. If morning joggers knew how tempting they looked to morning motorists, they would stay home and do sit-ups. ~Rita Rudner



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  • Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it. ~Fyodor Dostoevsky



    Nobody forgets where he buried the hatchet. ~Frank McKinney "Kin" Hubbard, Abe Martin's Broadcast, 1930



    I love Thanksgiving turkey. It's the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts. ~Arnold Schwarzenegger



    Once a woman has forgiven her man, she must not reheat his sins for breakfast. ~Marlene Dietrich



    As a man, I've learned that there is nothing easier in married life than pleasing your wife with your cooking. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com



    The closer one gets to the top, the more one finds there is no "top." ~Nancy Barcus

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